One in Christ
* True Christians are united in Christ (Colossians 3:11). Regardless of ethnicity, social status, or gender, divisions and wrongful attitudes of superiority or inferiority are not acceptable.

¶ "There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus" (Galatians 3:28, NIV).

* However, there are still distinctions among people. For example, God has established structures, and has assigned different people different roles in these structures. Nonetheless, regardless of position or role, Christians should treat one another according to the principles in Colossians 3.

* After giving instructions concerning relationships within the Christian community (3:12-17), Paul gives instructions concerning relationships within the family. Read Colossians 3:18-21.

Wives & Husbands
* In verses 18-19, Paul addresses wives and husbands concerning the marriage relationship.

* Verse 18 says, "Wives, submit to your husbands". Christians in general are to submit to one another (Ephesians 5:21). However, in this context, the wife's submission to the husband is based on the God-established structure for the family. The husband is to be the leader.

* Verse 19 says, "Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them". Husbands are to love their wives "just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her" (Ephesians 5:25). This kind of love is a self-giving love (personal and sacrificial).

1. What kind of marriage relationships have you experienced or observed? How do they compare to the teaching of these verses? In attempting to apply these verses, what are some of the difficulties or problems?

2. For husbands and wives to obey these instructions, what is needed?

Children & Parents
* Verse 20 says, "Children, obey your parents in everything". Verse 21 says, "Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged". Ephesians 6:4 says, "Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord" (NIV).

3. In what ways might parents "embitter" their children? In what ways can parents "bring [their children] up in the training and instruction of the Lord"?

Slaves & Masters
* In verse 22, Paul addresses "slaves", who were also members of the household. Unlike the family structure, slavery was established by humans, not God. In his letters, Paul neither approves slavery nor encourages revolt (1 Corinthians 7:17-24). But he tells both slaves and masters to live according to Christian principles in their relationships with one another.

* Read Colossians 3:22-4:1. Because the master/slave relationship is a kind of boss/worker or management/labor relationship, the principles taught in these verses are often applied to modern working relationships.

4. In applying these principles, what are the responsibilities of the worker or employee? What is the proper attitude and motivation?

5. What are the responsibilities of the employer or boss? What motivation is given?

The Primary Relationship
* The primary relationship is our relationship with the Lord. As Christians, we relate to others as we should because "it is fitting in the Lord" (3:18) and "pleases the Lord" (3:20). We serve others as we should because "it is the Lord Christ [we] are serving" (3:24). If our relationship with the Lord is good, we will be both motivated and empowered to live as we ought to live.

Reflection/Application
† Of the human relationships mentioned in this lesson, which one needs the most improvement in your life? Commit to work on that relationship by God's grace. Seek guidance, resources, help and encouragement. Keep in mind "the primary relationship". What do you need to do?